Project Vision 21

Francisco Miraval

A few weeks ago, two female students came late to my early morning class. Not only they were late, they were also dressed as if they were coming from a party. And they were tired. In fact, they were so tired they slept during the first half of the class and they left before the second half began.

I must confess I was upset. Being late is one thing, but coming to class, in the middle of the week, dressed for a party was, in my opinion, a clear indication these two students had problems with their priorities and probably studying was not included among those priorities.

I decided to talk with then, but they did not attend the following class. By now, I was sure that, as in so many other cases, these two young females wanted a life of party and fun, and not a commitment to their college studies.

That is the same behavior I saw many times among immigrants and children of immigrants in college, especially if they are the first one in their families to go to college. Also, young adults are continuously under pressure, so they need ways to relieve that pressure. So, they may attend a party or skip a couple of classes, if they decide they need it.

It is not that common to see two females students coming to a morning class dressed for a party and very party. But in this time and age, even uncommon things are no longer surprising.

Whatever the case, it was clear to me these two students needed to rethink their priorities and needed some help to overcome the behaviors preventing them from adapting to college life. And who knows what they were doing in their private life! Because I am a “good” person, I decided to give them a second chance and I sent them an email with a few extra credit assignments.

One of the students replied to me with an amazing answer. She told me she and her friend are both from a certain country in Asia. This is the first time they are far away from their families and for such a long period of time. However, they are almost in constant contact with their families, in spite of a time difference of 14 hours between where they live and where they families live.

Because they are closely in touch with their families, they are expected to attend families celebrations, not in person, but virtually (using a webcam.) So, in spite of the time difference, they have to dress for the celebration and even eat the food they would eat if they were in their native country. After participating in the celebration with their families (meaning, after being awake for most of the night), the two students came to my class.

I felt bad because I just them so incorrectly. They were not “bad” students, but good daughters. They taught me the same lesson I always proclaim: refrain from judging others.